I sure do complain a lot. I hate it when the only thing someone does is complain but refuses to make any changes or even suggest any changes. So I want to do something.
I decided to write a letter to my congressman. It's not polished and there are probably some grammatical errors and others I'm sure, but it's basically what I want to say. Let me know what you think.
Hello Congressman,
I am writing to request some information about spending in the government. Recently I've seen a lot of money going to other countries and a much smaller amount going to suffering Americans. I would like you to explain why it's necessary to continue sending money overseas when we're in the middle of a major pandemic. The money Americans pay into the Government should be going back to its citizens at this time.
When we're through the pandemic, we can then revisit sending Amercan's tax dollars to other countries.
I think the main thing to remember is this is OUR money. The money going to your salaries and to government programs and being sent to other countries is money provided by American citizens. You are supposed to be good stewards with this money and I'm one of many that think you're failing at that duty.
I for one would appreciate it if you would focus your efforts on how our money would better be spent here at home to help us first. We have starving children. We have poverty. We have women's issues. We have all kinds of issues. I'm not saying we can't be charitable with other countries, but we need to take care of ourselves first.
It's our money. Please give it back.
Thanks,
David
Good faith isn't just an attitude; it's a series of actions. It’s the commitment to a shared process, even when the topic is difficult. Here are the core traits to look for and to cultivate in yourself.
1. Intellectual Humility
This is the foundation of all productive conversations. It’s the understanding that your own perspective is incomplete and that you might be wrong. A person with intellectual humility isn't afraid to be proven wrong; they welcome it as an opportunity to learn.
What it sounds like:
"Based on my understanding... but I could be missing something."
"That's a good point. I hadn't considered it from that angle."
"Help me understand what led you to that conclusion."
Why it matters: It turns a confrontation into a collaboration. Instead of two certainties clashing, it becomes a mutual exploration of a topic.
2. The Principle of Charity
This is the commitment to interpreting the other person's argument in its strongest, most persuasive form. Instead of looking for flaws and attacking the ...
The worn leather of the armchair creaked a familiar protest as Michael settled in. Across from him, on the edge of the old sofa, sat David, a man whose face was as familiar as his own reflection, etched with thirty years of shared laughter, quiet commiserations, and unspoken understandings. But tonight, there was a tension in the air, a subtle crack in the foundation of their long-standing ease.
"Thanks for coming over, Dave," Michael began, his voice softer than usual. "There's… something we need to talk about. It feels like there's been a growing misunderstanding, and it's been weighing on me."
David nodded slowly, his gaze steady. "I'm listening, Mike."
Michael took a breath. "I've heard things, felt a distance. And it seems like you, and maybe others, have a picture of me that isn't true. Like I'm… someone I'm not. And I need to set the record straight."
He leaned forward, choosing his words carefully. "I want trans people to have the same freedom and rights as any non-trans person. I want ...
10 rules for a productive discussion about controversial topics.
1. The Prime Directive: Argue in Good Faith This is the foundational rule. Both parties must enter the conversation with the genuine intention of exploring the truth, not simply to "win," embarrass, or provoke. Assume the other person is also operating under this principle until proven otherwise.
2. Intellectual Humility: Be Willing to Be Wrong Enter the discussion with the understanding that your current position could be flawed or incomplete. The goal is to refine your own views through challenge, not just defend them at all costs. Acknowledge valid points made by the other person.
3. The Principle of Charity: "Steel Man" Their Argument, Don't "Straw Man" It Instead of misrepresenting your opponent's position to make it easier to attack (a "straw man" ), do the opposite. Articulate the strongest, most persuasive version of their argument you can, and then respond to that. If you're unsure, ask, "So, if I understand you correctly, you're saying ...
